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Focus on you love you first

Focus on you, love you…first!

Love yourself. Two of the most important words a girl will ever hear. You should always make sure you feel good about yourself and feel comfortable in your own skin.

There’s nothing sexier than self-confidence.


Loving yourself means you invest in yourself. Take some time to be comfortable with your identity, your life purpose, and health. Make sure you realize how beautiful you’re on the inside and out. Don’t rely on other people to build your character and confidence.


But wait…does this mean I can’t be in a relationship?

We get so many signs from social media about relationship goals. It’s as if single life is a wasteland before you get to the real part of life – being in a relationship. You shouldn’t think of yourself as being on pause before you meet your forever guy. Don’t be pressured by family and friends to be in a relationship.

Most of all, don’t compete with your social circle once wedding bells start coming around. Anyone can get married; it takes a lot to stay happily married.


When you are dating or in a relationship, make sure it’s for the right reasons. Here are 5 rules for dating that you should be keeping in mind.

Rule #1: Don’t date because you’re lonely

Sometimes, we just get tired of not having someone to bring to dinners, parties, and other events. We no longer want to be the third wheel and feel pressured to have someone on our arm. That doesn’t mean you should start following guys around, being extra thirsty or dropping hints about “needing a man” to every single guy you see. Go into dating for the right reasons – lonely isn’t one of them!

Rule #2: Wait until you’re older

When you’re older, you get better at spotting signs which might not be obvious to you in your early teens. Take the time to wait until you are 20+ to start dating. The guys aren’t going anywhere. Plus, a mature mindset could help you dodge a lot of bullets and broken hearts in the long run.


Read all about Juicy whose continuous search for love in men failed. Every. Time. Then she realized she needed to love herself before loving another.Didn’t They Tell You That I Was A Savage?

Rule #3: Set your standard higher than looks

Damn, he’s so fine. And? What else is there? Looking at a guy on the street or on social media and seeing how good looking he is, doesn’t automatically make him relationship material. There are so many guys out there who are overlooked because they might not be the ideal picture you have of a man. So he’s not a Morris Chestnut but., he may have a lot of qualities you want in a man that you are overlooking.

Rule #4: Have a purpose for dating

Have a goal and a reason for dating. Not the #relationshipgoals posts or to make other people feel comfortable that you may actually get married before the big 3-0. Go into dating knowing what you want from the relationship. Are you looking for someone to stay faithful, commit, build a life together, get married? If you know what you want you can clearly say “hell no” to anything that doesn’t look or feel right.

Rule #5: Be real

Be your authentic self! There’s nothing worse than a girl trying too hard or being fake. You need to bring all of the real you to the table. If he doesn’t like it, then it’s his loss. Don’t ever change or feel like you have to be someone you’re not.

Sometimes, you may fall into the trap of not taking as much care of yourself or not knowing who you are outside of the relationship. Never forget who you are.


Are you not spending time with your family and friends anymore? When was the last time you had some “me, myself and I” time? Can you even make your own decisions anymore or do anything by yourself?!

If you find yourself losing who you were before you started dating the best thing a girl can do is take an emergency time out. That’s right. Take a whole 3 days off from your man – no texting, calling, snap chatting, liking his posts, nada.

Do whatever you want to do with your girls, family, or even by yourself. Get your mojo back and set some boundaries for your relationship. Don’t let any man treat you any which way.

You’re a queen and make sure you keep on lovin’ you.


Which of these five rules do you stand by? Let me know in the comments.

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